Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic
by sanders-stabler-fan
Summary: Prequel to 'Our Wild Middle Earth'. Electricity was recently installed in Middle-Earth, and this made video cameras, TVs, etc. all availible to the citizens. When Aragorn gets a video camera for his coronation, he uses it to tape everything. CH. 6 IS UP!
1. Chapter 1: The Wedding Day

**Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic**

Summary: (Prequel to 'Our Wild Middle Earth'). Electricity was recently installed in Middle-Earth, and this made video cameras, TVs, phones, etc. all availible to the citizens. When Aragorn gets a video camera for his coronation, he uses it to tape everything.

Disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings.

**Chapter 1**

"What's this?!" a confused and excited Aragorn asked as he opened the box.

"It's a video camera," Legolas answered. "Top of the line." He smiled. "It's a little gift for your coronation."

"Aww, thanks mellonamin (my friend)," Aragorn said. "How does it work?"

"Uhhh.....I don't know," Legolas said. "Ada (father) bought it and told me to give it to you. I have no idea what it is or what it does, but I thought you could figure that out."

"Yeah, sure, Legolas," said Aragorn, and he rolled his eyes. "I'll ask Gandalf if he knows what to do."

Aragorn walked into the other room where Gandalf was sleeping on the couch. Aragorn tapped him on the shoulder.

"Stop in the name of the Valar!" Gandalf exclaimed when he was woken. He looked up. "Oh, Aragorn, it's only you. I'm sorry."

"Yeah...anyway, I just wanted to ask you if you know how to work this thing," Aragorn said, holding up the video camera. "Legolas doesn't know, and I can't figure it out."

Gandalf sat up and took the camera. "Hmmm," he began, stroking his beard. "I'm afraid I don't know either. But maybe if I try a spell, it will work."

He set the camera on an end table and picked up his staff. "Tula kuila, aiya templa (come alive, oh magic).....video camera," Gandalf said, and pointed his staff at the camera. They waited a few moments, but nothing happened.

"Oh well, I tried," Gandalf said, shrugging his shoulders. "I've got to get some more sleep." He laid back down on the couch. "Good night!"

Aragorn picked up the camera and walked back into the room where Legolas was. "He didn't know," said Aragorn.

"Oh," Legolas said. He was in the middle of applying some more eyeliner and mascara. "Too bad."

"Legolas, you're not helping," said Aragorn. "Now I'll never be able to use the present that you gave me!"

"Aragorn, we'll get it to work, okay?" said Legolas reassuringly.

"Okay," Aragorn said. "But you better get it working within the next few days."

"Why?" Legolas asked.

"Because my wedding is on Saturday! (A/N: It's Wednesday.)" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Sorry, I forgot," Legolas said. "I guess I'll have to cancel my spa appointment for this weekend. Darn it!" He went over to the phone that was sitting on the table and dialed the spa's number.

"Hey Mandy! How ya doin'? Good, good. I've got bad news. Yes, very bad. No, I didn't dye my hair black. And no, I didn't shave my head." He laughed. "I have to cancel my appointment for Saturday. Yeah, my friend's gettin' married. Yeah, I had forgotten. Guess what? He didn't even make me the best man! I know! Ripoff!" Aragorn heard this and gave Legolas a nasty look. Legolas ignored him and kept on talking. "Yeah, he's marrying Arwen. Yes, she's the chick with that amazing dark hair, those beautiful blue eyes, and those gorgeous lips. And she's got a hott butt!"

Aragorn heard this loud and clear and raced over to Legolas. "Hey! I'm the _only_ one who can say anything like that about Arwen!" he exclaimed. He jumped on Legolas and tackled him to the ground.

"Yeah Mandy, I've gotta go! Talk to ya soon!" Legolas said, and Aragorn grabbed the phone out of his hand.

"I hate you Legolas!" Aragorn yelled, wrapping his arm around Legolas' throat.

"Hey, come on, old pal! I was just kidding!" said Legolas. "Now get off of me!"

"NO!" yelled Aragorn, and he began to punch Legolas. Legolas hit him equally as hard in return.

At that moment, Arwen walked into the room.

"What the-" she began, and she rushed over to them. "What are you doing?"

They stopped the punching and looked at Arwen. "Hi, honey!" Aragorn said. "What...what are you doing here?"

"Well, let's see, I'll be the Queen soon, and I will be living here, so I think I have the right to be in this palace!" Arwen said sarcastically. "What are you doing here?"

"I was just beating the crap out of Legolas!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Why?" Arwen asked, puzzled.

"Because I said that you shone with the radiance of a million suns, and that you are the most beautiful being to walk this earth, and that none of us are worthy enough for someone as amazing as you," Legolas recited poetically.

Arwen was captivated by what he was saying, but snapped out of it when she realized it was Legolas. "Eww! Legolas! Stop it, you pervert!" she yelled. "The only person who can say that to me is Aragorn!"

"Finally! Someone sees my point!" Aragorn said. He looked at Arwen again. "May I continue?"

"Yes you may, your majesty," Arwen said, smiling, and walked away.

"Now where were we.....I know!" said Aragorn, and he continued punching Legolas.

That Saturday, Aragorn was finished getting ready and was sitting in his chambers. He glanced over at the corner and saw that the video camera was sitting there, put back into its box.

He walked over and took it out. After examining it and all of the buttons, he flipped out the little screen and hit the button labeled 'Power'. After it made a little noise, he thought it might be on. So, he hit the 'Record' button and saw a little red light go on.

"Wow....." he began. He was amazed by the way that whatever he looked at showed up on the little screen. "Cool.....I've gotta use this at the wedding."

He took the cameraand went to the courtyard, where the wedding was being held. He gave the camera to a guard who was sitting in the front row and showed him how to work it. He told the man to film the entire wedding.

Aragorn stood at the altar and waited for Arwen. All of the guests had finished filing in, and they were waiting for her to come.

Aragorn was sweating alot from nervousness, and kept wiping the sweat from his forehead. The guard was filming him and laughing at the way he fidgeted. Aragorn saw him filming him and gave him a mean look.

"Hey! Don't film me yet! Wait for Arwen!" Aragorn hissed. The guard laughed and kept rolling. "I said stop! Stop!" The music began before Aragorn could attack the guard, and Arwen and Elrond appeared at the end of the aisle.

They began to walk up the aisle. Arwen saw Aragorn at the altar and smiled at him. Next to him stood Elladan and Elohir, who were both best men, because nobody could pick between them.

Legolas was sitting on the end of a row, and when Arwen passed, he said, "...you shine with the radiance of a million suns... you are the most beautiful being to walk this earth...and none of us are worthy enough for someone as amazing as you..."

Arwen heard him and gave him a swift kick in the leg with her pointy shoes.

"Owee!" Legolas shrieked. He began to cry, and ran out of the wedding. Everybody had watched him, but their attention now focused to the wedding.

After Elrond had given Arwen to Aragorn, the ceremony began. It was now time to exchange rings. Aragorn turned to Elladan and Elohir, who each had a ring. They fumbled around in their pockets for a few moments and came out empty handed.

Aragorn felt his face turn red, and looked at Arwen. He mouthed to her that the rings were missing, and her jaw dropped.

"Where are they?" she whispered.

"I don't know!" Aragorn said quietly.

Just then, Legolas appeared at the end of the aisle. He walked slowly up to the altar and reached into his pocked. Out came the two rings. He put them in Aragorn's hand and said, "I stole the rings! I was jealous that you didn't pick me as best man, and I was mad that you beat me up the other day."

"Legolas, I'm sorry," Aragorn said. "I shouldn't have done that to you. Now why don't you have a seat in the _front row_ and enjoy this day with us."

Legolas scanned the front row. "But there's no seats left!" he said.

A beautiful Elf-maiden smiled at him. "You can share a chair with me," she said slyly.

"Gotta go!" Legolas exclaimed. He raced to the Elf's chair and sat down with her.

"This is great stuff," the guard said to himself as he continued to film the wedding. "Great stuff."


	2. Chapter 2: The First Day As A Married Co...

**Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic**

Snowboarding Person & pOpptartt: I'm glad you both like my story! I hope you like the next chapter!

Princess Aranel: Thanks! lol "great stuff"! I hope you like the next chapter too!

**Chapter 2**

"Rise and shine!" Aragorn said the next morning when he and Arwen awoke. He took the video camera from off of the nightstand and turned it on. He pointed it at himself and said, "Good morning. This is Arwen, my wonderful and beautiful wife, and it's our first day as a married couple." He pointed the camera at Arwen. "Say good morning, wifey!"

"Don't call me 'wifey'!" Arwen exclaimed. She faked a smile at the camera. " Aragorn, why are you filming us?"

"Because I want to remember everything about our first day as man and wife," said Aragorn.

Arwen looked at the clock on her bedside table. "Aragorn, it's already 12:30!" she exclaimed. "We've already slept through half of the day!"

"That's alright," said Aragorn. He leaned over and kissed her, and then turned off the camera. "I'll tell the cooks to make us some lunch." He got out of bed, threw on his robe, and walked out.

Aragorn came back up and got dressed, and Arwen did also. They walked down to the dining room hand-in-hand. And in Aragorn's other hand was the camera. He turned it on.

"And now, the royal couple is walking to lunch, and-" he began.

"Aragorn, what are you doing?" Arwen asked.

"I told you I was filming our whole day," answered Aragorn. "And now, we are entering the dining room."

They walked in and saw that the table was set very nice. Aragorn walked over to one chair and pulled it out. "I have now pulled out the Queen's chair, and we are about to sit down for lunch," he said. Arwen rolled her eyes and sat down. Aragorn sat down in the chair next to her.

He saw a maid who was standing by the kitchen door, looking bored, and called to her.

"Excuse me, ma'am, could you do me a favor?" he asked her.

"What would you have me do, my lord?" she said.

"I was wondering if you could take this camera and film us," said Aragorn.

"Of course, my lord," she said, taking the camera.

The maid pointed the camera at Aragorn, who said, "Arwen and I are now going to enjoy our first lunch as a married couple." He looked at Arwen, and she took a bite of her food. "The Queen has just taken a bite of her lunch. She's now picking up her water glass, and-"

"Aragorn! Stop!" Arwen said, enraged. "Is this how it's going to be every day? Are you going to have commentary on everything that I do? Are you going to tape my every move every day for the rest of our lives?"

"Sure! Why not?!" Aragorn exclaimed. "Keep rollin' the camera, Maid!"

"Arrrrgh!" Arwen grumbled. She got up from the table and stormed out.

"I'll take the camera," Aragorn said. The maid handed it to him. "As you can see, my wife can be a bit hostile, but she'll get over it. Now, I must go and find her, so that I can tape her _with_ commentary."

Aragorn took the camera and left. The maid began clearing the table.

"That's some good stuff on that camera," she said. "Good stuff."


	3. Chapter 3: Mood Swings

**Home Movies**

I AM EOWYN & Fan of Fan Fic: Thanks for reviewing! Enjoy Chapter 3!

**Chapter 3**

1 Year Later

Aragorn and Arwen were enjoying the anniversary feast that was held in the Great Hall. Most of the guests had left, and the rest were on their way out. Aragorn had his video camera (of course) and was taping the celebration. He had "interviewed" every guest before they left to get their opinion on how the party was. Everyone was trying to avoid him as they headed towards the door.

"Hey! You!" Aragorn called to a couple who were trying to escape. "I didn't tape you yet!"

The couple groaned and turned towards Aragorn with fake smiles on their faces. "Hi, Aragorn," the man said.

"Okay, I want your opinions on the party," Aragorn said, pointing the camera right in their faces.

"Well, it was enjoyable," the woman said.

"The food was great," the man said, nodding. "And the music was wonderful. Great dance music."

"And did you think that we were good hosts?" Aragorn asked suspiciously.

"Of course!" they said. "You are wonderful hosts."

"And we wish you both well with whatever the future may hold," the man said.

"And good luck with your child," the woman said. "He or she will be lucky to have you as parents."

Aragorn smiled. "Thanks for coming!" he exclaimed. "Bye!"

The couple hurriedly ran to the door and quickly left.

Aragorn walked over to Arwen, who was saying goodbye to the final guests. "Well, did you enjoy this evening?" he asked, giving her a kiss.

"Yes, I did, your highness," she said, smiling. Aragorn pointed the camera at the servants who were cleaning up.

"And this is the royal staff, who are having a wonderful time cleaning up this mess," he said. The servants all rolled their eyes at him and groaned.

"Aragorn, I'm going to bed," Arwen said. "I'm really tired."

"Goodnight," Aragorn said, giving her another kiss. "I'll see you in the morning."

Arwen waddled to the bedroom. Aragorn took his beloved camera and went to the living room. He plopped down on the couch and turned on the big screen TV, which was a gift sent from King Thranduil for the anniversary. The cable guys had come and hooked it up that morning.

Aragorn turned on the TV and began flipping through the channels. On one channel was a documentary on Isildur and the 1st defeat of Sauron.

"Boring!" Aragorn exclaimed. He turned to the next channel and saw that 'Monster Castle' was on.

"Awesome! I love this show!" he said, pointing the camera to the TV. "'Monster Castle' is the best show ever. But Arwen disagrees. She says that 'I Love the Third Age' is the best because they talk about me & how I helped defeat Sauron. I mean, I don't disagree that I helped save the world, and I'm glad they put me on a TV show or two, but I go for the manliest man shows on. Like 'Elf Women Gone Wild', or 'Extreme Carriage Racing'. But 'Monster Castle' is my favorite. It's about these people who completely transform a castle, and they give it a theme, and-"

"ARAGORN! SHUT UP!" Arwen yelled from the bedroom, which was right next door to the living room. "IF IT WASN'T SO HARD FOR ME TO GET UP, I'D RUN RIGHT IN THERE AND THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW! SO STOP BABBLING TO YOUR VIDEO CAMERA AND LET ME GET SOME SLEEP!"

Aragorn turned off the TV and went into the bedroom. "But honey, I was only describing my favorite shows, and-"

"I don't care what you were doing, but just shut up and let me sleep!" Arwen exclaimed. "Carrying around your heavy child all day makes me pretty tired, and I don't need sleep deprivation!"

"Arwen, my love, I wasn't trying to-" Aragorn began.

"Shut up, I said!" she yelled. After rolling over, she fell back asleep.

'What have I done now?' Aragorn thought. He shrugged, turned off the camera, put on his pjs, and crawled into bed.

The next morning, Aragorn woke up and went to a meeting. He went into the living room to see the rerun of 'Extreme Horse Racing' that he had missed the night before. Arwen was sitting on the couch with the footrest up watching 'Design on a Gold Coin', a decorating show about how to decorate a room for 1000 gold coins or less.

"Arwen, I'm sorry about last-" he began.

"Don't start with me," Arwen said, looking up at Aragorn.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Aragorn asked, sitting on the couch next to her.

"You should know," Arwen snapped. She turned back to the TV. The designers were decorating a nursery.

Aragorn opened his mouth to speak, but Arwen silenced him. "Aragorn, I am not in the mood to negotiate with you now," she said.

"Arwen, please," Aragorn pleaded. "I just wanted to apologize."

Arwen looked at him. "Aragorn, why didn't you just say so?" she asked sweetly, and gave him a kiss.

Aragorn was puzzled. She had just told him to shut up and now she forgave him.

'What is going on?' Aragorn thought. He pushed the thought out of his mind and smiled at Arwen. "I'm glad you're not upset anymore," he said. Arwen scooted closer to him and rested her head on his chest.

"Of course I'm not upset," she said. "Why would I be?"

"Well, a moment ago you said that you didn't want to talk to me," Aragorn explained.

"I did that?" she asked. "Estel, I'm sorry. It's just the mood swings."

"I've heard about those," Aragorn said. "Any strange cravings to go with them?"

"Actually, I could really go for some lobster," Arwen said. "And a baked potato, with butter and sour cream. And some strawberry ice cream with chocolate chips and marshmallows." She looked up at Aragorn. "You would get that for me, wouldn't you sweetie?"

"Of course I would," Aragorn said, faking a smile.

"Aww, thanks," said Arwen, kissing him.

Aragorn got up from the couch. "I'll be back in a jiffy!" he said, walking out of the room.'Great, I've gotta catch some lobster, cook a potato, and get ice cream,' he thought. 'I need some help.'

Just then, he saw Faramir walk by. "Faramir! Oh Faramir!" he called.

"Yeah?" Faramir asked.

"I need your help with something," Aragorn began.


	4. Chapter 4: Lobster Fishing

**Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic**

Slither-gurl: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like it! I hope you like Chapter 4!

**Chapter 4**

"Faramir, you aren't busy, are you?" Aragorn asked.

"Well, I _was_ going to look over the notes from this morning's meeting," answered Faramir.

"Faramir, you're not busy anymore," Aragorn said, putting his hand on Faramir's shoulder. "Today you are going to help me with something...something _very_ important."

"Like what?" asked Faramir suspiciously.

A little while later, Aragorn, Faramir, fishing nets, fishing poles, and Aragorn's video camera were out on the shores of the Anduin River.

Aragorn still hadn't explained exactly what they were there for, but he would.

"Okay, Faramir, you know how to fish, don't you?" Aragorn asked.

"Yeah, I guess," said Faramir. "What are you fishing for?"

"_We_ are fishing for lobster," Aragorn said.

"Lobster? What the heck do you want lobster for?" Faramir asked, surprised.

"For my lovely wife who is very dear to me," Aragorn answered. "She asked for lobster, and she's going to get it. And you are helping me catch one."

"Are you sure there's lobster in the Anduin?" Faramir said, peering into the water.

"Of course there's lobster!" Aragorn exclaimed. He handed a net to Faramir. "Faramir, let's go!"

They got closer to the water and looked for lobsters.

"Over there!" Aragorn said, pointing to a rock near the shore. "It's next to that rock!"

"So catch it!" Faramir exclaimed.

Aragorn squatted down and got his net ready. When the lobster swam away from the rock, he lunged at it.

"I got it! I got it!" he said, holding up his net.

"Your net's empty," Faramir said, rolling his eyes.

Aragorn looked at the net and his eyes bulged. "What?! Where'd it go?!" he shouted.

Faramir rolled his eyes again and walked over. "It's my turn," he said, readying his net. He saw a lobster by the shore and swooped the net down quickly.

"Darn it!" he shouted when the net came up empty.

"It's not easy, is it?" Aragorn asked.

"No," Faramir pouted. "We'll never get one. Now why does Arwen want one anyway?"

"Because she's having weird cravings," Aragorn replied. "I guess it's normal."

"Weird," Faramir said. After a few moments, he exclaimed, "Aragorn! I see another one!"

"Where?! Where?!" Aragorn asked.

"There!" said Faramir, pointing to a red spot in the center of the river.

"Let's get it!" Aragorn said, looking at Faramir.

They both yelled as they plunged into the river and dived for the lobster. After several minutes, they emerged from the river with a lobster in Aragorn's net.

"We...did...it," Aragorn said between breaths. He held the net up proudly as they walked over to where their horses were.

"Well, I have to get home and change into some dry clothes," Faramir said. "And I think Eowyn is wondering where I am."

"Okay," said Aragorn. "Thanks for all your help!"

"You're welcome," Faramir said. "I hope Arwen appreciates it." He rode off in the direction of Minas Ithil.

* * *

Aragorn went into the kitchen and had the cooks prepare the lobster, a baked potato, and some ice cream. He changed into some dry clothes and took the food to Arwen, who was now in the study. She was on the computer IM-ing Eowyn. 

AragornsElfQueen: so eowyn hows everything at home?

FaramirsGirl: im fine. how r u?

AragornsElfQueen: good. the babys fine 2. whats new?

FaramirsGirl: n2m. im glad the babys ok. boy or girl?

AragornsElfQueen: i know but im not tellin aragorn.

FaramirsGirl: will u tell me???? plz???

AragornsElfQueen: k but u have 2 keep it a secret. dont tell ne1.

FaramirsGirl: i wont. now tell me!!!

AragornsElfQueen: ok. its a.....

Arwen felt the presence of someone and turned around. "Aragorn! What are you doing?" she exclaimed.

Aragorn had been peering over Arwen's shoulder while she was typing. "So, you know?" he asked. "Why won't you tell me?"

"I wanted to surprise you," Arwen said. "And luckily I caught you before I typed it."

FaramirsGirl: arwen r u there??

AragornsElfQueen: ya sorry but aragorn came in. ill tell u later.

FaramirsGirl: k. but im dyin 2 know!!!

AragornsElfQueen: ill tell u after my husband butts out.

FaramirsGirl: lol

"Arwen, I brought you something," Aragorn said, showing Arwen the tray of food he had brought in.

"What's that for?" she asked, puzzled.

"It's what you wanted me to get you-a lobster, baked potato with butter and sour cream, and strawberry ice cream with chocolate chips and marshmallows," Aragorn explained.

"Aragorn, I don't want that," Arwen said. "Do you know how much fat is in that? Are you trying to make me fatter? Because if you are, that's really mean!"

She turned back to the computer. Aragorn felt his frustration boiling over but knew now not to upset her any more. He sighed and took the food to the dining room, where he ate it all himself.

FaramirsGirl: hey arwen faramir just walked in & hes all wet!

AragornsElfQueen: thats weird. ask him y hes wet.

FaramirsGirl: he said that him & aragorn went lobster fishing. y would they go lobster fishing? neither one of them r big fans of lobster.

AragornsElfQueen: dont ask me. i have no idea.


	5. Chapter 5: Eldarion and Hot Chocolate

**Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic**

ElvenMaidenHobbitGirl: I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for reviewing! Enjoy Chapter 5!

**Chapter 5**

(2 Months Later)

"Smile for the camera, Eldarion!" Aragorn exclaimed, aiming the camera at Arwen and the baby.

"Aragorn, I don't think he likes the camera," an exhausted Arwen said. "Why don't you put it down."

"But Arwen, I want to capture our son's first moments," Aragorn said.

"First moments? He was born almost a half an hour ago!" Arwen exclaimed. "And it's not like he'll be going anywhere soon."

Aragorn kept the camera on and zoomed in on Eldarion's face. "Coo-chee coo-chee coo!" he cooed at the baby. Eldarion began to wail.

"Stop scaring him!" Arwen said, holding Eldarion closer to her. "Shh, my son. It's okay. It's just Daddy," she said to Eldarion. "It's just your estranged Daddy. He'll get that camera away soon."

"Arwen, I am not estranged," Aragorn said defensively.

"Yes, you are," said Arwen. "You've always been that way."

"Have I really?" Aragorn asked. He thought for a moment. "Nah! I haven't always been weird!"

He pointed the camera at Arwen's face now. "Arwen, how are you?" he asked. "Any comments?"

"Aragorn, you sound like a stinkin' reporter!" she answered.

"I'm just asking questions," Aragorn said.

"I'm fine," Arwen said to the camera. "And the only comments I have are that my husband is a total nut, and I hope our baby doesn't turn out like that." She fake-smiled and looked down at Eldarion. Aragorn kept the camera on her for several minutes.

"Okay, get the camera away from me," she said, pushing it away.

"But Arwen, you're very camera-friendly," Aragorn said.

"I said, get the camera away," Arwen said through gritted teeth.

"I thought the mood swings were over," Aragorn said. "One minute, you're all happy and smiley, and the next minute, you're mad at me."

"You're very funny, Aragorn," Arwen said sarcastically.

* * *

(11 Months Later)

"Come to Daddy!" Aragorn exclaimed. He was sitting on the living room floor with his video camera, and Eldarion was attempting to walk over to him.

"Go to Daddy!" Arwen said from where she sat about five feet across from Aragorn.

Eldarion got halfway when he fell down.

"Oh, Eldarion, are you alright?" Arwen asked in a baby voice as she crawled over to him. Eldarion didn't cry, but just laughed.

"He's fine, Arwen," Aragorn said. "I bet he can make it all the way."

"Are you sure? Maybe that's enough walking for today," Arwen said.

"Arwen, he can make it," Aragorn said. "He's tough, like me."

"Yeah, like you're real tough," said Arwen, rolling her eyes.

Eldarion got back up and made his way over to Aragorn.

"See? I told you he'd do it," Aragorn said. He set the camera down on the ground and pulled Eldarion into his lap.

"You were right, I admit it," Arwen said, smiling.

"You're just like me, Eldarion. You're strong like I am. But your Mommy doesn't believe that," Aragorn whispered in Eldarion's ear.

"I heard that," Arwen said. The doorbell rang. "Oh, I bet that's Faramir and Eowyn. They said they were stopping by today." She got up from the floor. On her way to the entryway, she passed Aragorn and gave him a little knock on the head.

"Owee!" Aragorn whined, rubbing his head.

* * *

"Hi! How are you?" Arwen exclaimed, giving Eowyn and Faramir hugs.

"Fine, fine, how are you?" Eowyn asked. "How's the family?"

"Aragorn! Come here!" Arwen yelled into the living room.

Aragorn walked in with Eldarion in one arm and his camera in the other hand. "Hey, how are you?" he asked.

"Good!" Faramir said.

"Little Eldarion isn't so little anymore, is he?" Eowyn said, reaching for him. Aragorn handed Eldarion over to her.

"He's grown, hasn't he?" Arwen said. "He's almost a year old!"

"Already?" Faramir asked.

Arwen nodded. "Time's gone so fast," she said. "And guess what happened today?"

"What?" Eowyn asked.

"He walked for the first time!" Arwen said excitedly.

"Wow! He is growing up fast!" Eowyn exclaimed. "The last time I saw him, he was still crawling around."

"Why don't we go to the living room," Aragorn suggested.

* * *

Arwen and Eowyn were sitting next to eachother on the couch. Arwen held Eldarion in her lap. Aragorn and Faramir sat on the couch across from them. Aragorn was holding his camera in his lap.

"Arwen, do you have any hot chocolate?" Eowyn asked.

"I think we do," Arwen said, puzzled. "I'll go get some." She started to get up, but Faramir stopped her.

"I'll get it," he said. "I know my way around the kitchen pretty well."

"Of course you do," Eowyn said. "You know your way around everyone's kitchen."

Faramir laughed and headed towards the kitchen. Aragorn followed him, along with his camera.

"Eowyn, are you sure you want hot chocolate?" Arwen asked. "It's not even cold out yet."

"I'm sure," Eowyn replied. "I'm really craving it right now."

A lightbulb went on in Arwen's head. "Eowyn, are you...."

Eowyn nodded and smiled.

Arwen smiled back. "Eowyn, that's great! Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"That's why we came today," Eowyn said. "To tell you the news."

* * *

"Hot chocolate," Faramir said. "Hot chocolate? What next? A whole ham? Some beef jerky? Or fresh fish from the Anduin?"

"That sounds pretty good," Aragorn said, his mouth watering. "How about we add some potatoes, and maybe a little corn, and some rolls, and-"

"Aragorn, I wasn't talking about food for us," Faramir said. "I meant for Eowyn."

"Oh," Aragorn said. "You were making me hungry for a minute."

"Aragorn, she's been acting this way for months," Faramir said, as they reached the kitchen. "But I guess it's part of the deal."

"Deal?" Aragorn asked, but then something clicked in his head. "Oh, _that_ deal. You mean, Eowyn's pregnant?"

"How did you know?" Faramir asked.

"Arwen did the same thing when she was pregnant," Aragorn said. "You better get used to strange cravings. And mood swings." He shuddered. "Those can be pretty scary. But congratulations." He patted Faramir on the shoulder.

"Thanks," Faramir said, rummaging through a drawer for a spoon.

"Spoons are over here," Aragorn said, opening a drawer.

"You read my mind," Faramir said, taking the spoon from Aragorn. After putting some hot water into a mug, he said, "So, how long will this last? I mean, the cravings and mood swings and all?"

"Faramir, it never ends," Aragorn said, getting out a bag of hot chocolate mix. "Those things last forever."

Faramir gulped. "For...for..forever?" he stuttered.

Aragorn nodded. "It's brutal, I know, but that's the truth," he said. "You see, it starts the first time they're pregnant. From then on, they're not the same. They eat constantly, and they get grumpy easily. Things won't go back to normal."

Faramir went pale. "Aragorn, I'm scared now," he said.

"Faramir, look at me," Aragorn said. "I'm handling it just fine, so you can too. Be tough. Don't be a wimp."

"I won't be a wimp," Faramir said.

"Don't give in to her," Aragorn said.

"I won't give in to-" Faramir began.

"Faramir! Is my hot chocolate done yet?" Eowyn yelled to the kitchen.

"Yes, dear, I'm on my way," Faramir shouted, taking the mug and heading towards the living room.

"I thought I told you not to give in!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Aragorn, it's even worse if you don't give in to Eowyn," Faramir explained. "She knows how to fight back. She's tougher than I am."

"Don't give in, man!" said Aragorn. "You can never give-"

"Aragorn, while you're up, could you get Eldarion's bottle?" Arwen shouted to him.

"Yes, my love," Aragorn yelled back. Faramir rolled his eyes.


	6. Chapter 6: The Return of Leggy

**Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic**

**SORRY FOR THE VERY VERY VERY LONG WAIT!!! I'VE BEEN SO BUSY IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS WITH SCHOOL AND EVERYTHING THAT I HAVEN'T HAD MUCH TIME TO WRITE!!! I HOPE THAT THIS CHAPTER IS GOOD AND AGAIN, SORRY FOR MAKING YOU ALL WAIT!!!**

ElvenMaidenHobbitGirl: I hope your head is okay! lol And get up off the floor! lol jk

p0pptartt: lol Faramir is still scared in this chappie!

Ice Is Cold: I'll try to keep it upwardly directing! By the way, are you supposed to be working in your english class, huh? Are you slacking off? lol JUST JOKING!!

Moonyasha: Legolas will make a return in this chapter, so don't worry!

**Chapter 6**

(1 Year Later)

"FARAMIR!!"

Faramir looked up from the newspaper he was reading. "Yes, dear?" he shouted.

"Can you come here, please?!" Eowyn yelled back to him.

Faramir grunted and set down his paper. He made his way towards the kitchen. "What is it, my love?" he asked gently, but in a sort of annoyed voice.

"Faramir, where's all the coffee? I thought you just went shopping!" Eowyn exclaimed.

"Honey, that was three weeks ago!" Faramir explained. "And besides, you hardly ever drink coffee, and I don't either."

"Yeah, sure," Eowyn said sarcastically. "You're telling me that you haven't had coffee lately?"

"Yeah," Faramir said.

"Faramir, how can you _not_ have coffee when you have a six-month-old baby?" Eowyn questioned. "Faramir, I _need_ coffee! I've been up all hours of the night for the past six months and now we have no coffee! How will I live?!"

"Geeze, Eowyn, you're such a drama queen," Faramir said, rolling his eyes.

"_What_ was that? _What_ did you say?" Eowyn asked. "Did you call me a _drama _queen?"

"Uh, no, I didn't, umm...." Faramir stammered. _'Stupid, stupid!'_ he thought to himself. _'Now I'm dead! Dead!'_

"Faramir, Steward of Gondor, do _not_ give me that tone!" Eowyn shouted.

"Sorry," Faramir whispered, and lowered his head.

"Now go get me some coffee!" Eowyn said, sending Faramir away.

* * *

"Why, why, why?" Faramir muttered to himself as he walked towards the door. He grabbed the checkbook and his cell phone and walked out the door. 

After closing the door, he took out his phone and dialed a number.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Aragorn, I need some help."

"Who is this?"

"You're buddy."

"Who?"

"It's me, Faramir."

"Oh, it's you. Sorry, but our caller ID hasn't been working lately. But anyways, what's the problem?"

"It's Eowyn. She's bossing me around and has been really cranky lately."

"What's she been doing?"

"Well, right now, she's making me go to the store to buy coffee because she _can't_ live without it."

"Oh, I see. Faramir, I had the same problem. But don't worry. You'll get used to it."

Faramir glanced over his shoulder and saw Eowyn heading towards the door.

"Oh, no! She's gonna see me!" He dashed towards the bushes and crouched down behind them.

"Faramir? What's going on?" Aragorn said.

"I'm supposed to be at the store but Eowyn's coming outside and she might see me," Faramir said in a whisper.

The door opened and Eowyn walked out. "Faramir, are you out here yet?" She looked around. "Faramir?" She headed in the other direction.

"Aragorn, I'm scared! She's gonna hunt me down and find me and see that I'm not out buying coffee and-"

"Faramir, get a grip! You sound like a whiny little toddler!"

"Aragorn, I'm gonna make a run for it. Wish me luck." Faramir ended the call, and got up from the ground slowly. He got out of the bushes and dashed towards the garage. He snuck inside and got into the shiny new car that Aragorn gave him as a "raise". After turning it on, he drove away, and Eowyn never saw him.

* * *

Aragorn was sitting in his study with Eldarion in his lap later that day when the doorbell rang. He picked up Eldarion and his video camera, which was sitting on his desk, and went to the door. 

"Legolas? Is that you?" Aragorn asked after opening the door.

"Hey, old friend!" Legolas replied, and threw his arms around Aragorn. "It's good to see you!" He let go and took a step back. "Oh my gosh! Is that Eldarion? Wow! Can I hold him?"

Aragorn handed Eldarion over to him. "That's Eldarion," he said. "You haven't seen him yet, have you?"

"No, unfortunately," Legolas said. "He's so _cute_!"

"I have to get Arwen," Aragorn said. "I'll be right back."

Aragorn left and came back a few moments later. Eldarion was crying and trying to escape from Legolas' arms.

"Legolas, what did you do to him?" Aragorn asked. He noticed something across Eldarion's nose. "What is on his nose?"

"It's a pore strip," Legolas began. "I noticed that his nose was a little oily and I thought this might just do the trick. If you don't start them with proper facial care early on, they won't get it."

"Legolas, get that off of him!" Aragorn said.

Legolas gently removed the pore strip and handed Eldarion back to Aragorn.

"Is Arwen coming?" he asked.

"Yeah, she'll be right-" Aragorn began.

"Legolas! Oh wow! It's really you!" Arwen interrupted and ran to Legolas. "Wow! How are you?"

"I'm fine, and how are you?" Legolas asked, and gave Arwen a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm good, I'm good," Arwen said. "Wow, I just can't believe you're back! We haven't seen you in almost two years!"

"I know, I've been busy, but now I'm here!" Legolas said and gave Arwen more kisses on the cheek.

After several minutes of cheek kisses, Aragorn put an end to it. "Legolas, that's enough! She's my wife, not yours!" he said.

"Oh, sorry, Aragorn," Legolas said. "I was just so happy to see her that-"

"Yeah, whatever," Aragorn said and rolled his eyes.

"Guess what?" Legolas said.

"What?" asked Arwen.

"I brought someone with me!" He excitedly went back outside and came in with an Elf-maiden behind him. "Everyone, I'd like you to meet Wilwarin, my wife!" (A/N: I looked on a website and it said that Wilwarin means butterfly in Elvish.)

"_You_ got married?! No way!" Aragorn exclaimed in a surprised voice.

"Yes way! I tied the knot!" Legolas exclaimed. "And guess what else?"

"What?" Arwen asked.

"We're staying with you for a few months! Isn't that great?!"

**TO BE CONTINUED..........**


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